Preparation
It's been 8 days since Jon and I's appointment at the National Embryo Donation Center (NEDC) in Tennessee. I would have updated sooner but after the appointment there was a lot that Jon and I had to process through and decide upon. I am going to give you a summary of what happened that day to document our journey, but also share in the life that is embryo adoption.
We arrived at the clinic at about 8:45am. I had to have a full bladder for my appointment, but thankfully years of training as a teacher has prepared me for this ha ha. It looked like a typical doctors office waiting room. We filled out a little paperwork and waited to be called back. The IVF nurse we've been emailing back and forth called us back, checked us in, and we waited again to see the Dr.Keenan who does all the embryo transfers. He met us in his office with another doctor he was training. He asked us about our medical history, what brought us to this point, our goals in this etc....Now granted while this conversation is going on I STILL have a full bladder, but again that teacher training really helps.
I then finally had my examination with the lovely sperm mobile you see here hovering over me! At least they have an awesome sense of humor. All I could think about is that my mother would make that ha ha. The fun and embarrassing part of the appointment is that I had to empty my bladder after one of the examinations to get another test/examination done. This required wrapping that completely stupid, easily ripped, paper that we have to place over ourselves during examinations. Am I right ladies!?! I have a booty too, so "wrapping" this around myself is not happening without exposing the "Moon over Miami". Oh, and no, the bathroom was not right next to my examination room. It was all the way down the hall right by the entrance where all the other patients come through. The nurse said she would be there to let me know when it was clear to walk back to the room, well....when I open the bathroom door to go back, who was not at her post?? Say hello to another patient's husband, and sir, say hello to me desperately trying to make sure all is covered while ripping the paper even more.... Ah well, adds to the awesomeness that is this journey and story ha ha!!
After the examinations, they brought us to another room with some chairs. There we talked to Dr.Keenan and the doctor training with him. He told us everything looked great and that we were medically cleared for an embryo implantation!
Then, we met with Kathi, the Patient Coordinator, and Carol, the Embryologist. Kathi will be the one who will find genetic families for us to be matched with. She will look at our profile, hobbies, education etc... and find matches and send them to us. Carol will be the one who unthaws the embryos on the day of our implantation. We discussed with her how many we would be attempting to implant and how the process works. We also are working with a woman in Michigan, Debra, who is reviewing our home study, and verifying our education on the process. NEDC works with her to complete the home study and contract side of things. She will also be the one that is our mediator between the genetic family and us to help us on completing our open adoption contract (deciding how much communication we will have or contact we will have). Kathi will be in communication with Debra to know when she will start matching us with genetic families.
Next, we met with Juliana to talk about the financial side of things. Whoo hoo!
Lastly, we met with Lynda, the IVF nurse we met at the beginning. She gave us another folder of paperwork explaining the medications I will be on to prepare for implantation of the embryos. Pills and two different kinds of injections. I have to have a detailed calendar just to understand it all. She also showed us around the area where we will be on the day of the implantation.
Overall, the appointment took 3.5 hours and was a lot to digest. We needed to decide if September is when we want to try to implant our embryos. We needed to decide how many embryos we are willing to have implanted. Now because Jon and I want an open adoption, we also want the embryo to have both parents genetically related to the embryo, not egg donation or sperm donation. We want our child to be able to know their genetic parents and siblings without having to deal with the anonymous side of things. It was a big reason we decided to go this route. Because of that choice, those families typically have less embryos (only 3-5). Carol told us then we need to decide if we are ok with being matched with a backup genetic family and also are we ok with the possibility that two separate genetic families could be implanted at a time. In that case we would also need to have a genetic test done after the child is born to determine whose child they are.
We have decided that we are going go for a September implantation no matter what. This means having faith that we can raise at least up to $4,000-$5,000 by then. We also decided that we would have up to 3 embryos implanted at the most. Finally, we decided to agree to being matched with a genetic family and a backup genetic family to ensure a better chance of pregnancy.
Right now I am starting on prenatal vitamins, setting up our phone call with Debra, and starting to actually plan what I would like to do in the nursery. I never wanted to plan out the nursery, because everything was so unknown, and so many hurdles to jump over. But now, as we draw nearer to our beautiful baby(ies), I see myself having a desire to plan for these things that bring hope. I am excited to soon be using the baby items we have. To believe that all of this will one day be our reality is amazing!
Please continue to join us in prayer and support as we continue on this journey. Encouraging words, loving friends and family, and financial gifts have all been a blessing to us! I am sitting on my porch as the summer breeze blows through and thinking about how many people have a hand in helping us build our family. It shows that family is bigger than just us, but those whose love has been shown to us. We will continue to keep you updated as new things arise. Right now I, Andrea, am hosting a KEEP collective jewelry party online and on facebook in which 10% of the profits will go towards our adoption. We as always, have a GoFundme page as well. Every bit helps bring us closer to our goal of a September implantation! Blessings!
KEEP Collective online party website: https://www.keepcollective.com/with/jenniferfinnesgard
GoFund Me page: https://www.gofundme.com/jonandrea2adopt
